Seeking God Knows What

Okay, Overwhelmed, I’m taking ya up on this. Yes, this is my third post of the day: the first was during naptime and now Widget is playing outside.

God:
I have to agree with Overwhelmed here. I know that I am not doing enough to serve You. I am working hard at trying to make sure that I recognize Your presence in my life every day but I often find myself doing other things instead of either reading the Bible or doing a devotion or something. I do pray a lot, although, I admit that I often feel like perhaps I’m praying the “wrong way” because I don’t seem to hear anything from You.

My parents:
I love you both very much but I will not take sides in any of your arguments. I think you should learn to compromise. No one is perfect and you are both at fault for the problems you have.

My cat:
Would you quit deciding that 4 in the morning is a good time to wonder if you have any cat food? Yes, you do. 99% of the time there is food in your bowl in the same place it always is. You do not need to paw at the closet door until we get up in order to reassure us you know where your food is. We know. We put it there. Also, chewing on plastic bags is not a good idea. You then hack up nasty cat puke, with a lovely piece of plastic bag in it on our floors. Not our idea of fun nor should I think it is very enjoyable for you.

Widget:
My wonderful child, I wish you would realize that if you held still instead of screaming and wriggling while we change your diaper, it would go much faster. I know it just your age but it makes the whole process much more difficult. But no matter what, I will always love you and nothing will ever, ever change that- even the trauma you make diaper changing into.

My “favorite” neighbors:
I do not understand how you can find each other’s company enjoyable when you spend 90% of it screaming and swearing at each other. Your attitudes, in general, seem very hostile. Also sitting outside our bedroom windows (yes, I know your driveway is there, I didn’t design the neighborhood) and smoking while talking/arguing on your cell phones at 11 PM is not a very neighborly thing to do nor is revving your motorcycle at 5 am and installing obscenely bright lights on your garage that you leave on all night long.

Target stores:
Why do you have to have so many enticing things to buy when I’m there? Particularly clothing and stuff for Widget? The kid has enough clothes and yet, I’m constantly looking through the clothing section for her. On a side note, I do think you could be somewhat more accomodating to adoptive parents as well with your baby registries. I understand that you like to have an expiration date for registries but couldn’t you just make it say 1 year after creation rather than forcing me to put a “due date”? (actually, this applies to all baby registries everywhere). I generally have maybe an inkling of when the child will arrive but there is not guarantee.

ME:

Get a new job. Find friends. You have to call people. There is nothing wrong with you. Stop being so “shy” and afraid of making these changes. They will be good for you. Oh and just wake up and be happy

I went with neither phone and got this one which will be free once I get the mail-in rebate. Of course, I spent $50 to get a new car charger, case and hands-free headset (which I needed as I always use my phone in the car). Plus I’m trying out the new VCast service which gets me unlimited mobile web for $15 instead of $5 for web that deducts from my minutes. I can always cancel it Edited to add that I’ve already decided to cancel it because apparently the enhanced services are unavailable in my area. You’d think the guy would say that

So, it is time to upgrade my cell phone (well, that is I’m eligible to get the good deals on upgrading my phone). I have Verizon Wireless which means I get up to $100 off the phone price. But I cannot decide which phone to get.

I’ve narrowed it down to two.

The Motorola E815, A fancier model of what I currently have. Would be free.

or

The LG VCast A much cooler phone with available QWERTY keypad and cool e-mail program. Would not be free but $100.00

Now why would I want to spend the extra money to get the second phone?

Side note T has rolled his eyes mightily about me even debating.

Here’s my rationale: I use my phone for the Mobile Web a lot. Primarily e-mail, but also news, weather, blogs, forums, etc as well as calling people. (When I’m supposed to be working or when I’m sans my wonderful wireless laptop :p) The second phone flips up to have the additional QWERTY keypad rather than the time consuming -and it is- scroll through letters, miss the right letter, scroll through again typing method standard cell phones use.

Now the web plan I have counts against my monthly minutes. And well, I have 100 free minutes (cause they screwed up on something for me) that are up at the end of August, and I have a tendency with my takes-me-forever-to-type messages to run right up to that limit, plus the mobile web usage is usually delayed and so I don’t really know how far over I could end up. And that costs me 45 cents per minute. Or I could up my plan to make sure I don’t go over but that would be $20 more per month. So my thinking (perhaps illogical as in I want the fancier phone) is that spending more to speed up my mobile web usage would reduce the minutes used, therefore proving more cost effective down the road.

What to do, what to do…

ohhh, bad thought, I may end up liking the speedy web usage so much, I spend more time using it. Hmmm…

But I still want it.

Your advice solicited

This Saturday begins the “Family Vacation” with my family. Now last year was the first year we stayed at the cottages with my parents because Widget was here and we didn’t want to camp with a seven month old. The prior few years we camped at nearby Platte River campground. This year T, Widget & I will be staying at my maternal grandparents’ home in Benzie County just outside of Frankfort for two reasons: one is financial- we can’t afford to contribute to the cottage rental fees and the other is well, it will be too crowded and chaotic.

Of course, T is “abandoning” me after Wednesday because he couldn’t get the last two days of the week off (so dumb). My mother called me today and has “volunteered” herself to help me with Widget by staying at my grandparents at the end of the week. Hmmm… Not exactly easy for me to say, “Thanks but no thanks” since they are her parents. Based on the last few years, I suspect this is her “out” of the chaos being at the cottages too. This development will probably annoy Dad, though, as he likes to have her there all the time. He’ll probably drink too much around the campfire with my brother-in-law E (MK’s husband) since that is what he did last year with T and E. At least staying at my grandparents’ will keep me from getting annoyed with T for staying up too late and drinking and then wanting to sleep in every morning, even though Widget did not want to sleep in.

Now, after last year, I vowed that our family vacation would not be THE Family Vacation. Too much tension, too much stress, I was an emotional wreck last year, we ended up leaving a day early and Widget had an ear infection. Heh heh. Guess what, so far this is our only vacation planned. Now T has promised me he would take some additional time off this summer, he better!

Sounds like tons of fun, eh?

Actually, I do love being in northern Michigan. I’ve been visiting there my whole life. My favorite things to do are to hit a trail or two in the Sleeping Bear Dunes National Lakeshore, attempt to skip rocks and watch the sunset at Point Betsie, drive around Crystal Lake and the Pierce Stocking Scenic Drive (no, those are not my photos just some I found when I googled the scenic drive). We usually take one day and visit Traverse City, eating pasties at Cousin Jenny’s and walking around downtown. Just sitting on the beach is the best part, of course.

I have mixed feelings about this vacation. I love being up north and I do enjoy spending some time with my family. However, in the last couple of years, it has just been more stressful than beneficial as a vacation. Plus, I know we need to do more things like this as our own little family. Break free, so to speak.

Whew. Don’t know what is going on but I have been really tired lately.

My sleep schedule is pretty much the same (except Thursday night when I was up late finishing our profile stuff) but I just keep wanting to lay down and take a nap. Example, I got about 7-7 1/2 hours (my usual) of sleep last night, I’ve only been up for two hours and I am so tired I keep yawning and I can barely keep my eyes open.

And if I don’t sleep, then I get a headache and I’m crabby…

The couple picked another profile.

So I guess it isn’t time yet.