Adoptionspeak
So, since *someone* can’t interpret all my shorthand for adoption terms, here’s a list, memorize it, there will be a quiz on it next week
aparent= adoptive parent (sometimes shortened to AP)
p-aparent= prospective adoptive parent (sometimes shortened to PAP)
bmom= birthmom, should only be used after the termination of parental rights, up until then, she is still the mom.
Do NOT use the initials b and m, that is a bowel movement not a woman who goes through the pain of childbirth.
emom= expectant mom, generally only used to separate out women considering an adoption plan from the rest.
firstparent= biological parent, I like this reference because it is true: they were the first parents to my child. It doesn’t make me feel less real or natural since I am a real mom and I’m a natural 
TPR= Termination of Parental Rights.
Revocation period= time after TPR that a firstparent has to revoke without question. After this period, usually has to prove fraud or duress to have placement overturned and sometimes it doesn’t get overturned even then. Some states have no time period after TPR, some have a day or two, some a week or two.
Legal Risk= taking placement of a child for a possible adoption knowing that TPR has not yet occurred. In our case, Widget was legal risk for 12 weeks and at any time, L could have just called to say she wanted to parent and that would have been the ”end” of it.
Closed adoption= No contact with the firstparents or their families after placement. Generally, no identifying information such as last names, address, phone numbers are shared.
Open adoption=To me, this means fully open with relatively frequent contact via phone calls, letters, pictures and several visits a year (like what we have with L). Identifying information is usually always exchanged
Semi-Open adoption= to me, this is everything from just occasional pictures, letters, phone calls, and includes a visit a year or every couple of years. Identifying information may or may not be exchanged depending on the parties’ comfort level.
Transracial adoption= child is not of the same race as the adoptive parents.
Transnational adoption= child is adopted outside of the United States
Kinship adoption= child is adopted by a relative of either biological parent. Grandparents of the child are often involved in this type of adoption.
My personal opinion is that my child deserves to at least have her firstparents’ full names and birthdates. Even though L chose to use the name we put together (we picked the first name and she picked the middle) on her original birth certificate, I wish I had a copy but I don’t. I know I have all the same information but it still makes me sad to know it is locked up and Widget may never get a copy of it.
I think that is all I use but if something else needs clarifying, just ask!
